2002-10-25 - 9:56 a.m.
I'm at work. I have a million things to do, but I don't want to do them.
I'm really thinking I could, maybe, write a detective story.
The reasons are: it's not really about the crime, I think. It's really about the atmosphere -- I think I could write about Richmond. It's an atmospheric place, in a way. The detective could be some kind of mom -- throw in details about driving, kids. And also, detective stories are often about underachievers -- people whose lives have somehow been disappointing. Somehow, I think I could do this --
What else --
I stopped on my way into work to buy gas. I got to the parking lot, later, and was rooting around in my pocketbook to find my extra keys for the parking guy, and noticed that I didn't have my wallet. Crap, I thought, not remembering that I must have had my wallet to buy gas --
As I was walking off, the lady behind me said, Is that your wallet? And it was -- sitting there on top of the car. It took me a while to remember how it must have got there.
So I must be a little lucky.
Anyway -- I'm thinking about my latest realization. I don't really want to do anything. I mean, I could go to law school, and I'm sure it would be interesting, and make my current job more interesting as well. But what I'd really like to do is to have more time to do nothing.
I think this has always been my ambition.
I think if I had a little more time to do nothing, I would come up with lots of things that I want to do. Not likely that they'd be life-changing things, but they'd be things I like doing.
So that's my goal -- to try to figure out how to have more time --
The trouble is, this goes against another major tenet of my personality -- take no risks.
I'm working on it, though --
design by simplify.