2003-09-23 - 11:14 a.m.
"What it is, is, it's impediment-building."
Heard in the hallway, coming back from the cafe with my cup of tea AND a chocolate muffin.
I can eat a chocolate muffin since I rode my bike to work. Yay me!
Hmmm. What else.
Nora started thinking, maybe, about private high schools. I'm pretty sure we can't afford that -- Hmmm.
I'm trying not to have an impediment-building attitude.
Actually, I'm sort of having a crabby attitude. But not a bad crabby attitude. More sort of an impatient crabbiness. Like I don't feel like putting up with a bunch of crap. Like, I don't have time for that. Like, you want to be a moron, go right ahead, but don't expect me to participate, because I have other things to do.
It's kind of a refreshing way to feel, but it does mean -- well, I'm not quite sure what it means.
It has certain ramifications for social interaction, I guess, although I have been lunching successfully with people. It seems to have the effect of making me glad I'm not them.
I think at heart I'm not actually a very nice person. I mean, I'm not exactly mean. I wouldn't go out of my way to do something mean to anyone. In fact, I really wouldn't do a mean thing to anyone on purpose.
And there are definitely people I like --
I'm just sort of inclined to think people are idiots.
Oh oh oh -- I had a dream last night. This morning, actually. A branch was scritching against the house, and kept waking me up.
I cut somebody's head off, so I guess I was a murderer, or then, possibly, it was someone else who did it, but I was protecting them, so I dug it up, but then I had to find a place to hide this head, which was in a plastic bag. At first it was with another bag full of rotting fruit, and I was carrying it around outside -- in some woods, in a national park -- something like that -- looking for a place to bury it. As the dream went on, it became smaller, until finally it seemed to be only a fragment of bone in a plastic bag, that I could stick in my pocket.
I still needed to get rid of it, though.
And Kevin reminded me last night that we will have been together for 25 years as of some time in October.
Okay -- got to go.
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