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Morass
2003-06-27 - 2:32 p.m. So -- It's still hot. But I'm going home soon, which will make it all better. Plus I am drinking a bubble tea. Yumm. It is very interesting when you have kids, because you find yourself drawn into all sorts of complicated relationships with people that you know because of your kids -- other parents, usually. It's very hard to like the kids of a parent you don't really like, or the parents of a kid you don't really like, and it's also hard, if the parents seem to be the kind of people who make life difficult, not to think the same of the kid. But often I think it's really true. Insecure and whiney parents seem to have insecure and whiney kids. A person I happen to know who is a complete hypochondriac and drama queen, has turned her daughter into a kid who is continually interested in adult gossip and worries about illnesses. However, she is also a kid who always has a great haircut and is good with little kids. It is funny -- I think in general I try to avoid social drama, and to me that seems like a good thing. And it seems to me that my kids, do, too. Also, I'm completely unsympathetic about physical pain. Yes, it hurts, but what can you do. The less you think about it, the sooner you'll forget it. I'm sure that's because I have a pretty high pain threshhold -- it's not really that I'm extra virtuous, although I know that I secretly think it IS so. And I've never enjoyed being friends with people who are mad at you one day and then friends with you the next, and you never know why, but you could certainly expend a lot of energy trying to figure it out. A friend of Nora's seems to be sort of like that -- at least from what her mother tells me. She's at camp with Y, but Y seems to not be speaking of her, possibly because of something X told her -- Nora actually seems to have a reasonable relationship with this girl, but I think Nora is like me, and not well equiped for all that kind of stuff. So they seem to be friends outside of all that. You know what I'm thinking -- I'm thinking it's the popular kid thing. This girl is probably a popular kid. Isn't that a popular kid kind of thing? You can see that I never was one. Yet the fact that I even think about this at all shows that I, too, was scarred by all this stuff. But actually, I never regretted not being a popular kid. I had a great circle of friends. I was a smart kid, which always seemed like a better option. I guess the interesting thing here is how involved parents can't help getting. I have lunch with this girl's mother, and I wonder if she isn't a social lunatic, too -- I'm ecstatic that Nora doesn't seem to have volatile relationships with her friends. I can't seem to express this right, but what I really wanted to talk about was how it's not very nice to make judgments about people, but I guess what I'm really talking about is how hard it is to not do so -- I like this girl, and her mother. I like to have lunch with her, and I like to hang out with her at school functions. Oh -- I don't know. If we were all in school, though, I would like her, but she wouldn't be my best friend. I'd be friends with the other parents who don't delve into the social minutia of their kids' friendships and who read books and have wicked senses of humor. Oh, it's too hot. Bye.
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